It’s not something that I want to do a massive amount of right not. I have to for work and I enjoy my work, all three jobs in fact. Thinking is an important part of my work. Then there’s autopilot, fake smiles that are so ingrained in my professional being, that it’s second nature. when inside I couldn’t care less. I have made a career out of supporting people, empowering, encouraging them, pushing them to be the best they can be. The past few weeks, I have learnt a lot about myself. If I don’t do it, whatever it is or take care of myself in the way I look after others, it doesn’t get done and no one cares. I saw a young man who used to come to my youth club and was really pleased to see me, he told my son to look after me because I am one of the good ones. It made me feel grateful and I realise my impact is important. That’s externally though. My current group, I am not so sure of, I am aware they need this group but they need structure more. I gave them too much credit, they can’t see the value and take and take. My friend died on Friday, no warning, happy guy, left a loving close nit family.
It’s great helping others, if I don’t make sure I get looked after and my mental health is taken care of, then it’s all been for nothing. I won’t let that happen, I have too much good going.